Ways of managing children's tantrum

A crying baby

Three year old Michael David can cry non stop for hours when angry or seeking for attention.

He exhibits this same crying attitude in school, said the teacher. Michael cries, and at the same time rolls himself on the floor especially when corrected. He does not want to be left alone, and he cries until he is satisfied with it.

Tantrum is an emotional blow-up normally associated with children,  otherwise, those emotional distress and in a typical manner characterised by being stubborn, cry, scream, defiance, angry, rant even when trying to be calmed by mothers or guardians, the child resists the attempt.  In some cases, he hits the mother.

Tantrum is also said as a way children show annoyance and frustration. It can happen when they are hungry, uncomfortable or when they can not get what they want, it may be something or someone (parent) to attend to them.

According to Adolescence Psychologist, Dr. Ojeme Maria Chika, she said that tantrum is neither a disease nor toddlers behavioural issues, it is part of development process in most children, they will outgrow it with time.

 Dr. Chika said “children exhibit tantrums to attract their parents’, guardians’ or teachers’ attention and it is mostly at the age of one to three, then from age four, any normal child will stop.

It is not easy to calm children giving out tantrums because they do it to seek attention. Parents or caregivers should find out why the child is troubled. Discuss with the child and agree on certain conditions due to from the age of two, a child can reason with you when you discuss with him or her”, she said.

The doctor added that tantrum happens due to communication problem. If a child can speak a language clearly to express his or her need there won’t be a any need for the attitude.

She advised parents, caregivers and teachers to study the underline cause to know how best to handle the child. Know what triggers the child’s action and as a person in control, don’t loose your temper, it will worsen the condition.

Dr. Chika added that the parent can rebuke or punish the child in a mild way, like not playing with toys for few minutes. And take other mild action that will calm the child. Avoid physical punishment like beating. Talk one on one with the child.

The Child Mind Institute (CMI) advises that first thing to do in managing tantrum is to understand the child. It is difficult than how it sounds, since tantrums and meltdowns bring forth a lot of different things, such as, fear frustration, anger, sensory overload and so on. And since tantrum is not a very clear way of communication, parents often don’t know what causes it. Parents and guardians should find out what is really happening to the child and learn techniques to calm him or her.

In some cases, most children stop crying when they are tired of doing so thereby leaving the parents frustrated.

Steps in handling tantrum
1. Practise prevention, make sure your child rest well to prevent excessive stress
2. Stay calm when the child starts his or her tantrums.
3. Make use of toys to distract him or her from exhibiting the attitude
4. Play with the child
5. Do not give in to them unnecessarily, be patient.
6. Take time out if needed



Daily Trust